Saturday, November 22, 2014
Friday, November 21, 2014
Thursday, November 20, 2014
I know some of you, my taquitos, get especially anxious during the holidays. I know, I know, sharing time with relatives and old friends is not the fun thing of Christmas cards and television specials. For some, quite the opposite about gatherings; it triggrrs sweaty palms, crumbly tumblies, and sleepless nights. Will your gifts be enough and good enough?, more importantly will you be good enough? What will you wear? Who will you take? What will they all say and think? I know, I know. Not to worry, I got this...ready? --You will never be good enough in your idealized picture of you and your life. While sadly, you may never be good enough in the eyes of some of your 'loved ones', that is more about them than you. You can hope to change that but ultimately it is up to the individual. The rest of your loved ones don't see anything wrong with you, and would love the opportunity to spend more time with you. Your gifts are good enough, the main thing you have to work out is the ability you develop for accepting yourself when you carry around this idealized version of you- Forgetaboutit!! you will never be good enough, fuck idealizing, good thing thing for you is that you have all the time in the world to get to know you and accept yourself and all your quirky imperfections. You have you, and always there will be you. There is no one else like you, it's true, good or bad. You are you and it is these 'imperfections' that make you "you". Your deep love of the color purple, dirty lymerics, mudding, gin and tonics, combined with the mean streak that is set off by any type of bully imposing their will over everyone else. You are you; embrace it. Get over it, learn to love being you. Get over it, we are not perfect, none of us. Not even close. We are temperamental, emotionally driven, sometimes petty, and often times smelly little organisms that are changing our environment faster than anyone could have imagined, that goes for all of us. From the prettiest supermodel to the most valuable CEO, smelly little organisms that have trouble controlling their impulses. But that also means that if you don't take yourself too serious and just appreciate yourself for who you are, you get to see that we are all more similar than different. We all have an opportunity to be happy, if you allow yourself. This season was not designed especially to irk you, or make you blue. It can really can be a time of joy. So many people are happy that you can and should get happy by proxy. It's a free high, of sorts. Like hanging around enough potheads(I do), your bound to get a contact high (yep, I do), if not an actual high. Don't resist it and 'hate' the holidays. Get around enough giggly happy people that, you actually have fun. Don't take away their happiness by poo-pooing on this, their favorite time of the year. Revel in their happy times, eat their cookies for crying out loud! You just may find it to be like holidays of old, with hot chocolate, tinsel and shit. Unless the holidays never were that, in which case now that you are running your life, totally indulge and make that the reality for yourself this time. Buy tinsel and string lights in whatever color you want and chuck them everywhere and anywhere you like. This is your life. Claim it. Happy Holidays, ya'll! Let's make this time, like all times, something worth being alive for. Make these moments, count. And for goodness sakes whether you decide to be alone or surrounded, allow yourself to be happy. Don't deny yourself this great opportunity, that surrounds us during this time of year. The beautifully gaudy and glittzy decorations that ooze out of any display window, and apartment building that can afford colored paper YAY. Being happy is better for your health, so do us a favor, eh?, but for realz, eh? smile-manwasIdrunk!
Wednesday, November 19, 2014
Tuesday, November 18, 2014
Helloooo there my little chiquitos of the night. I have been a bit occupado with trying to find a new job. I, like many other people I am guessing, need to seriously make more money. I need (ugh) a second job, or , preferable a better job, 'cause life life is hard for a pimp...er I mean I am tired of not having enough money. I am, thankfully, seeing my life slowly start moving in a new direction, and I am liking it. I just need to stay focused on staying on the same path while, still enjoying life and being the best version of me I can be.
On a different note, I am still getting rid of things, clothes, so far, and I am having these dreams where people from my past, have some interaction with me, and I swear they seem very vivid, and real.* It appears that I am resolving some issues with people from my past, or solving some issues I own, by way of people I know or used to know. I think these dreams show me, the patterns I keep, and, the value I place on needs and others' value of me. We all want to be loved, I suppose is the point I am reminding myself of, when I sleep. It's okay to want to be loved and needed, it is not a weakness; to want to be needed. I like it. We all do I suppose.
* The most recent dream I had was of walking home in a group, with friends. The walk home from a day of hanging out, spending a day together. This dream, focused on the feelings after a day, an event, and at the end of the night, walking together, joking, but making our way to our separate homes, our separate lives, our own families. Watching friends smiling faces disappear behind the darkness of closing screen doors, then the final wooden door. The group getting smaller and the growing loneliness until you see your best friend going in and disappear as he smiling and kind of waving, nodding, like young people do. These dream have the nostalgia and idealization that I seem to keep my old friends in. They remain in time frozen and unchanged. I can clearly see what the point is. I get it. I love dreams when they are so vivid-manwasIdrunk
Monday, November 17, 2014
Sunday, November 16, 2014
Have you guys been thinking about handmaking gifts for your loved ones? Sounds like fun, right? I am telling you, my little meximelts, it is absolutely the way to go, giftgiving wise, if you want to save a little money, if you want your gifts to be a little more personal, than what is offered on store shelves, or if you have developed a great talent for making things that people are drawn to when they see them... or taste them. Can you make jams, or jellies? Pickles? - I, personally, love to recieve a handsigned pickling jar, with pickled cucumber or any other vegetable... wow. They are so difficult to make! It goes without saying, to people around me, that they are safe in getting me any homemade foodstuff as a gift. First of all: it's food. Secondly; it's food. I drool. Cakes, cupcackes, a bunch of cookies, brownies OMG I am making myself hungry here, trying to explain something. That something is this: handmaking gifts for people you care for is so gratifying, that once you make people gifts, simply buying gifts is just not enough. Not even close. You realize why food made by people who love you tastes so good: it is made with love and the best intentions. manwasIdrunk
I just dig giving people stuff I make for them with them in mind. I feel so good while I'm making it, wrapping it, and finally delivering it. Likewise when I receive a handmade gift. It is so precious, to me. TOTALLY PUNKROCK!! D.I.Y. (even when I put the bow). I love it. So If you're thinking about it go ahead jump right in, do it! Don't be afraid of what people will think of you, or whether they will like your gift. If you made it with your hands and the individual cares about you, they will love it. Unless they are a heartless materialisic monster with their intestines put in backwards and upside down, then your loved one is a weirdo (and you can do so much better). Go ahead get your hands dirty! That's what they invented soap for. keep shining-manwasIdrunk.